Caged and free all in one.

by gobtcha

Hello, I hope everyone is well.

Today I want to share what I feel when coping with epilepsy and having a seizure. As I did have an episode today,  I am fine as is the family no worries.

I want to try and place you the reader in the scenario of course it is your call to read it as such:

Caged in a trance watching someone look at you in horror, knowing if you make a move all control will be lost and you will hurt.  Trying hoping for it to pass every second feeling like a day pass by that person begins to ask a question “are you okay?” You slowly carefully shake your head, glad still terrified that you can do that.  Time still ticking, something building up in your mouth seeping out.  The person says your drooling and hands you napkin, you begin to take it and Snap!!! you are free again.  Still taking your time you clean the drool the meet that persons eyes and convince them at that moment it has passed by, still silent hoping the stigma does come with the episode.  It does she begins to jot the date down and you begin to state not to do this as it does only make it worse.  Another breathe and you are truly free for awhile more.  She then asks what happened, she knows well enough it is Mom.  You say that my diet is off and sleep  is off, all true.  Then you go back to the conversation as if nothing happened, just a bit tired.

I always reflect back though on it. See what happened and where I can improve to not let it happen again.

So with what I see right now, it is time to take a break from a few things and get back into somethings I enjoyed like EvE Online a great mmo game.  If you see me there feel free get into contact with me there.  My call sign in EvE is Gobtcha as well.  I will be active for a month only unless something good happens.

I do need to refocus on my health, I have neglect it so back on it as it were.  Drinking liquids that are good for the body, trying to lay off some of the bad stuff.  Distancing myself a bit from some stresses as well.  All in all  just refocusing my habits again.  Of course trying to listen to what “she” the spirit that has been with me for sometime has to say.  Found some things about her as well.  Wish I could share, but really should not right now.

That is all for now I am worn out gonna rest.

 

Thanks for reading,

Gobtcha

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