Admitting

by gobtcha

Hello, hope your well today.

I am tired, but that’s fine.  Today I want share an opinion or point of view, that is admitting your faults and actions as person.

I used to get angry at myself for every little mistake I made in a social situation or a competitive sport.  One day I snapped in a close friends house and did not like myself and broke in to tears out despair and anger at myself after raging at someone who simply nudged a bit at my temper that was flaring all day from class etc.  Hour or two later, I finally apologized to him for being angry it was not right of me to be angry at him at that moment.  Soon then another buddy, drags me away.  Said to me that I was a good person for admitting my faults and seeing to meet ends.  I now see that more in people that do not admit they are wrong or merely want to run away from the issue.  The buddy stated that I just need to be not so hard on myself, which is the truth of it.  Disliking or possibly hating myself for raging at someone when I was a guest at a house is not good sure.  Just needed to correct my mistake and move on.

The above story is an example of a fault of mine at that time I had a bad day and should not have gone out, to be around someone who was recovering from a major issue himself and he could not control himself.  Lesson learned move on.  So today as I went about a project I am working on slowly, mostly out of curiosity.  Working through it, browsing through “stuff” the thought came back to me “admit it” as I was reflecting on what the buddy  said and did for me.  So I told that thought, “I admit that I like women there curves, voice, eyes, and charm. Sometimes more.  I admit I am a man and want that touch of a female I had asked for at the beginning of this journey.  To me it was a gentle reminder to admit what I truly want.   The other thing that came to mind was a few words.  Humble, Humility, and Hubris.  I do not know much, but I gather this much at least.

To be Humble is to show Humility.

As for Hubris well just looked it up  via Google I understand pride well enough.  I have so little sometimes, when that self esteem which is related goes up it is shot down by something or someone.  So then I ask myself should I have some Pride in myself? Keep a balance of Humility and Pride in me or carry that about myself.  It is an idea.

 

Yesterday for me was long, went to a wedding and the reception the day for me started at 12 pm ended around 1 am.  When we, friends and I showed up at the church, once in the church I felt a lot of energy or people around the place. “She” may have been holding my hand and kept close during the ceremony.  My guess is “she” is happy with the couples choice or just wanted to be near.  I was happy and nervous.  The minister did a great job as well.  I believe something about what she had to say made the occasion special for “her”.  Not sure though.  I observed that was notion of God, Jesus, or Holy Spirit directly.  Just indirectly and only once while there, the words his lord.  I do understand it can connect to many things, but it is mostly connected with Lord Jesus and the like.  Either the couple seem to happy together,  makes me so happy for them.  The reception was traditional in most ways.  Which is good, celebrating love and life all day is awesome, especially with friends.

 

Thanks for reading,

Gobtcha

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