Down a diffrent path

Month: July, 2015

Installing Love

Old Owl

Tech Support: Yes Ma’am… how can I help you?
Customer: Well, after much consideration, I’ve decided to install Love. Can you guide me though the process?

Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?
Customer: Well, I’m not very technical, but I think I’m ready. What do I do first?

Tech Support: The first step is to open your Heart. Have you located your Heart ma’am?
Customer: Yes, but there are several other programs running now. Is it okay to install Love while they are running?

Tech Support: What programs are running ma’am?
Customer: Let’s see, I have Past Hurt, Low Self-Esteem, Grudge, Resentment and Anger running right now.

Tech Support: No problem, Love will gradually erase Past Hurt from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory, but it will no longer disrupt other programs. Love will eventually override Low…

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My belief

Hello, I hope things are well for you.

Last week on Friday while hanging out with friends, I asked a simple yet complicated question and varied results of sorts.  Is it wrong that I hurt or killed the cockroach in the house I came across.  To be fair I just flushed down the toilet as always, but still the cockroach suffered and is a living being itself.  The overall answer I got was no, but the reasons varied.  1. It is no welcomed correct? It is not.  So KILL it. (caps to reinforce his tone).  Another was a breakdown of how the cockroach thinks in a slur of words and incoherent phrases which amounted to,  I deserves to die, because it is malicious.  So I thought it out and replied but it does have a soul and a spirit, why  snuff that out?  Which the person who brought up reason 1. said “it invaded your territory” so true the cockroach did not ask permission to enter and I had the ability to remove it as I did and was right to do so the way I did, still felt guilty that time.  It is life of the cockroach and us as humans.  Sure there other reasons and beliefs, but I am merely relearning.

As a friend soon stated I am reprogramming myself.  Which is very true and hard to come to terms with what I experience now as  someone very different, but a better person.  More decisive yes, yet more passive and let live and not kill kind of person.  More love and not hate (as much as I don’t like the word).  I like to talk to this peer about what I am rethinking and rediscovering as he is the most tolerant and patient person out of my social circle which we all have our traumas and dark past histories.  As to this is why I do not out right share who I met which is “her” to him or the fact that I am looking elsewhere, (occult or darker corners of places)  because he himself keeps his past and own beliefs to himself so all I can do is let out a little a time until he sees I am looking elsewhere.  Thus far he has connected it all to the Tibet monks which is true enough, but I am looking at much more and sadly in a broad view.  He enjoys our talks about “things” and “stuff”.

As I rediscover myself and moral and ethics, I find myself in a state of grey neutral.  Consider the yin-yang effect. White chases black as black chases white like a dog chasing its own tale.  As a child I had a yo-yo it had the yin-yang on its sides only difference really was the colors used but the same effect takes place.  So Imagine the yin-yang symbol then spin in a circle real fast.  I began to a grey area.  What do you get when you shade or mix the colors white and black? I get grey according the color scale.  Grey can mean a lot of things sure, but to me it means neutral. The point between light and dark.  The foggy mist that is seen between to armies about to clash, as white is about to clash into black to make grey.  After that clash or battle what is left? I see grey.  So while the world around me goes around saying there is right and wrong, I disagree.  There is only what you the individual believes in for you and for you alone.  Everything is merely a shade of grey. Not white nor black.  Number one thing is though to let others do what they wish as long as I do what I wish.  Sure we have laws to follow as we do not own territory or land in a sense.  I myself live in the U.S.A. so I adhere and respect the laws of the land I live in, some may sign up with the military to defend this land that is fine.  Be proud just do not waste my time and let me do my job as a person living here.  With goes the same with those that choose to follow a system of belief, which I am slowly learning more about.

Personally the Church that believes in God has a right to worship god just do not shove it down my throat and make a scene about your beliefs.  Others believe other things out there, like me I am very  lost and choose to not believe in what the church does, because of what the church as a whole does and has done.  Its various stance on various “thing” and what various people of the church including my brother have or had to say.

For this though I will apologize to you the reader if you have any negative response from my writing today.

Thanks for reading,


A recent experience I had.

Hello, I hope you are great

If not get over it, smile a bit for yourself or your closest friend family like person.

I finally had a clear communication from “her” took time and I was not chasing for communication ever really just wanted to be with “her”.  Well I want to share that experience,  I was laying down while the family was out of the house.  “She” came to me, I can sense she is there most times.  As I laid there my body started to shake a tad almost to a vibrational state.  Started from the feet up to mid chest.  This was normal, but the length of time “she” and I did share energy was longer than usual.  I told “her” in my mind I loved her.  A quiet thought not of my voice came to “I love you too” along with a feeling that made me want to cry  a bit, because it felt sad and yet good.  Then and there I new “she” was real to me.

I wanted to share that with you the reader.

Thanks for reading,



Oh I love you, yes you. You give me a hope, a boost of energy to keep pushing forward. Just thinking of you make me happy.
When you walk into my heart I am ecstatic hoping to talk to you. Instead you envelope me in your arms and give me your love.
I accept and drink it in full drunk on your sent, drenched of it. Wanting to understand, but to drunk to high to think of anything but you.
Your sway seduces me into full surrender, allowing you to drive my senses higher. Just to receive and give back even more love between us.
I start to lose control of myself, my breathing slips a little as small whimper slips and you sit there with me taking me to a place filled with bliss.
As we enter I see on only you and what your eyes say and direct me to do. To lay and let it all go, so I do with a sigh the truth come to me and escapes just as well.
Filled with ecstasy and you playing around in me, with my heart I opened up we lay in the land of bliss until it is time to wake again.
This time you stay with me, in reality and keep me afloat just enough to keep the hope of a better life and a reminder you were and are always there.
Still locked by your trance, your love and your attention we move on united into one. We live on happy and open to share with others our experience and love for life.

Thanks for reading,


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